“I’m sure it’s fine.” The doctor said. “It will be okay, everything will be fine.” I heard these words as I sat in a doctor’s office for the third time in three months. “With the holiday Monday and with the doctor going on vacation, it might take us 10-15 business days to diagnosis this.”
Great. So I may have skin cancer. But I may not. As I was leaving the doctor’s office, I knew that I had 10 days in front of me to anxiously await the results of my test. 10 Days. 10 DAYS.
As I made the slow walk back to my car and got out my keys, I thought through my two options.
When I got home, I sat silently on my couch and contemplated the roller coaster of emotions that I was confident I would experience for the next 10 days. I weighed out the two options in my mind. Do I give up and accept Option 1? Do I try to calm myself down and strive to be like Option 2?
I realized that I was going to go through a little bit of Option 1 and a little bit of Option 2.
There was no denying it. I may be an emotional mess for the next 10 days. Crap. I am the one who is always happy and positive. People are counting on me to lift them up. I have to get myself together. I can’t let them down!
As I started listening to myself judge that I was going to be a mess for the next 10 days, I worked on quieting the self judgement.
I decided to give myself a break. I decided it was okay if I wasn’t going to be all sunshine and roses and happy go lucky for a couple of weeks.
No matter what the results are, I can control one part of my health. I can commit to having some love and compassion for myself.
I realized that we all have a healer within each of us. We can all Command Joy by Healing Now. We can start by healing our relationship with ourselves.