Have you ever heard of the Crab Effect? When live crabs are placed in a bucket, they will be in the bottom crawling around and inevitably, one crab will start crawling its way up out of the bucket to escape. As it does this, another crab will reach out to it and pull it back down. This happens over and over and over again - one crab starts trying to crawl itself up out of the bucket, and the next one will pull it down. If they just let the crab crawl itself out to freedom! But they don’t.
There is a theory that we, as a society, act similar to the crab effect. Depending on who we surround ourselves with, we will subconsciously stay at their level. Rather than pull each other up, we pull each other down. This is why it is so important to carefully select who we choose to spend our time with. Our fab five, or the fabulous five people that we are closest to, will influence us in ways we don’t even realize.
Take a look around at other people’s fab fives. What do you notice?
Successful people hang out with other successful people. Partiers hang out with other partiers. 9-5ers associate with other 9-5ers. CEOs play golf with other CEOs. We naturally gravitate towards people who are in a similar life stage and level of success that we are in.
So when we are frustrated with the lack of progress we have in our lives, we should look at our own fab five, at who we spend the most time with and ask ourselves some questions:
We may not even realize it, but over time, we start picking up on other people’s values, ways of thinking, and behaviors. Think about it. How much of what we believe was shaped by what our parents taught us? What we know about what is right or wrong, good or bad…where did that come from? How did we start thinking that way?
It’s been said that you are the average of the 5 people closest to you. Yikes! The AVERAGE.
So if we want more of something in our lives, we have to surround ourselves with people that have what we want. We have to force ourselves to get out of our comfort zone and reach out to the CEO, the banker, the home owner, the entrepreneur that we look up to and admire.
In the comments below, tell me , who is in your Fab Five?